"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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