I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I think people are normalizing furries
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Randomize
