he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Randomize
