Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
