eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
