I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
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