thus making me awesome and them whores
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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