I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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