i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
