Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i drank out of a bidet.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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