Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
We have started to decorate penises.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
