You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
