My first STD was from a foam party
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
