idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
