Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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