So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
We had sex on a dog bed..
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
