I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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