I think I died a long time ago.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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