Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
