i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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