Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
