my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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