I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
