You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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