I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
