It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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