I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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