Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
