Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
