Plan B is the new Plan A
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
