Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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