you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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