i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
