dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
