Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
