It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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