i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Randomize
