id be glad to
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
