so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
