It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Randomize
