im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
