i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
