Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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