Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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