Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
