I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize
