Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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