haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
