mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
