Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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